We have lift off.

Pretty sure I intended that pun, but hopefully won't be made to suffer for it via a peep show at my wedding. Because ladies and gent, it has been decided that indeed kilts will be worn, along with the jackets and fancy bits to cover the other bits and some dangly stuff to be bitsy with some other bits and whatnot.

May I present to you the ensemble of the groomsmen:


Voila! It's more formal than I had been aiming for, but it sure beats the barefoot/barechested look that Groom has been threatening me with lately. I'm sure the jackets will be on for all of ten minutes, but won't those be a dapper few sixths of an hour?

Now my only problems in wedding life related to this are: gussying up the bridal party with fancy accoutrements like jewelry and feather hair gewgaws, and making sure my Great Aunt doesn't make good on her threat to walk around dropping change next to the groomsmen, a la John Candy in Splash* in order that she might take a gander up at the goods under there. Perhaps I should save her the trouble and just have the guys where really shiny shoes...


*rumors of a remake had tales of Heidi effing Montag vying for the mermaid. Really? It's come to this? And by the way, that movie came out 25 years ago. I. AM. OLD.

Shoegeoisie

My dress was so cheap (even after I made the budget-busting move of changing the ribbon color from royal to midnight blue, gasp!) that I had thought to spend some ducats on a sweet pair of shoes, something fancypants that I would be able to wear more than once and continue to admire from afar (not unlike the Fluevogs I got in Ashland during Doctor Jones' wedding festivities, for example) again and again in all the long years to come. Would I dare go so far as a Choo or a Blahnik? You know me, so the answer is: Obviously not. However, I wouldn't turn away a good pair of Chanel or Weitzman or similar finery on the sale rack at Nordstrom or maybe even Saks (maybe).

One small problem with my shoe-fetishistic plan of going shopping for an expensive bargain: I have no time. Well, two problems: One, I have no time, and two, I have this fucked up toe that needs fixing and needs even more to not to be busted out in the light of day until after such fixery (which will happen this week and which will apparently be costing upwards of seven times the pricetag for fixing the same damn toe in an Urgent Care in Ventura five years ago - of course it never quite looked right after that and clearly needs to be done again, so maybe you get what you pay for? whatever, anyway...). So public shoe shopping spree not really on the docket for your favorite bride up here in Stumptown. Add to the complications: I've been advised to go with creamy/ivory/similar-to-my-dress-color tones, rather than easy-to-find pewter/silvery stuff. (In part, I've been informed, because my dress is a more buttery/creamy shade of warm off-white, not the blueish/cool bent of a more eggshell or ivory white, and therefor might not mesh as well with silver as with golden tones, etc etc etc. Gold doesn't work for my thematic goings one, really, so that's off the table anyway). After hearing this, I admit I fretted for longer than necessary about what kind/color/shape/height/color/color/color shoe I would or wouldn't be able to find, and how would I make this happen in the few weeks we have left, etc.

But then lovely Ren-bird turned me on to Endless.com and voila, a shoe-shopper was (re)born. On their way to me now are the following:


Love t-straps, but don't love pointy and could do without the rhinestones.

And these babies, which I adore, and pray to the wedding gods of Easy Peasy Lemon & Squeezey that they will work as perfectly as I imagine them to in my mind:I love them beyond all reason. And ps they are only like $50 bux. And they have them in a lovely mauve and a gorgeous blue (hint hint). Check em out if you have a chance. In the meantime, I'll let you know how this works out. They should arrive tomorrow, in time for my final dress fitting (which reminds me to tell you to remind me to tell you of the horrible strapless bra hunt shopping experience I suffered through on Saturday. blurgh).

So that's that for the moment. Long live Imelda in our hearts and closets.